New Years Resolutions. Yay or Nay?
Every end of year I make a list of resolutions full of promise, hope and change for the upcoming new year. I fill my journal up with all the amazing things I should/will be doing to become a little better, a little closer to my ‘ideal self’. It goes something like this: Start my day with 20 min meditation, maybe also journal. Then do 30 min of yoga. Make hearty healthy breakfast, set some intentions for the day, work, grow my own veggies, clean my place 2-3x a week, 1hr workout everyday, call parents, take care of myself, walk 10,000 steps daily...and you know where I'm going with this. Sure, I can start with one simple thing and then add on but after a couple weeks, I’ve either forgotten about them or even worse...I dread those resolutions. Because they’ve become another item in my to-do list.
Dreadful tasks that fill up my days and remind me of what I have yet to do...and fail to accomplish, yet again.
I realize this happens to a lot of us. Setting goals with the best of intentions but then losing motivation as they become another list of chores instead of ‘that good thing’ we’re doing for ourselves. Because isn't that the point of resolutions after all?
I think in many cases they don't work because we’ve closed them off to how ‘the goal should be’ as oppose to 'how the goal can serve us'. That's when we're working from the outside in as opposed to inside out. (Thank you @stralayoga for this wonderful analogy that applies to everything). Are we constraining our intentions or allowing them to be flexible/adaptable with what life throws at us? Are we doing it because it feels good for us or because everybody says so?
Yes, 1HR daily meditation has great health benefits but not everyone has the time or desire to do so. Sometimes 5-10 minutes works as well. But what about being disciplined and repetition? Isn’t that how good habits are formed? Yes, and no. If it was that simple EVERYBODY would have the best habits and never be sick.
Our goals and actions need to be rooted from our intentions if we want them to truly make a difference.
You can try and repeat what's not working everyday suppressing your discomfort in hopes that it'll stick OR you can check in with how you feel as you try and explore what works.
Let’s say your intention is to journal everyday. How can you make this work starting from the inside out?
- WHY do you want to do this?
- HOW do you want to feel by doing this? This doesn't have to be complicated. It could be to feel calmer, connected, inspired, less anger or you're just curious and testing it out
- WHEN/WHAT are the best way to achieve this? A little bit of logistics. Morning, midday, night. Handwriting, computer, voice/video recording... This might take some time to figure out but it'll allow you to be flexible and test what works better. Maybe one day you feel like writing in the morning and another day at night. Doesn't matter, don't be too restrictive. If having a schedule helps you then do that, if not try something else!
It's about identifying what really matters to you and focusing your actions into making it happen in the most efficient + enjoyable way. It's not what everybody saids you should be doing but what you feel your body/mind needs and what will work for YOU. Sensitizing to your desires and seeing what fits you (even when you're trying something new!)
Resolutions shouldn't be a quest to perfection
But serve as guidelines and reminders for you to be good to yourself. To be kind and find ways to nurture yourself. It's ok if your resolution no longer works after a while. Be open, be curious and flexible. Remember, it's always a great learning opportunity when something doesn't work.
Below are some phone wallpaper reminders to help you check in and stay connected to your goals:
Do you have any resolutions for the next year? Share them below!
Happy 2018! May your next year be filled with blessings, love and new opportunities.
From the bottom of my heart: Thank you for tagging along 💖