5 questions to get into alignment
I can totally relate 😂
There was a time in my life where I was very sick and my healing journey brought me to completely change my eating habits and lifestyle... it was amazing, I felt so much better and eventually healed my gut completely.
But what started as a good mindful change, turned into an extreme obsession
I was “too healthy” eating only certain foods. I wanted perfection. I gave up almost everything I used to enjoy. Started to see certain foods as ‘bad’. I was constantly reading food labels and paranoid about what’s out there.
It was exhausting. I was planning my meals ahead whenever I would go out. I knew if I kept going like this I would have the “perfect body” but in exchange, it will cost me myself. I was bordering orthorexia nervosa: “An obsession with proper or ‘healthful’ eating. People with orthorexia become so fixated on so-called ‘healthy eating’ that they actually damage their own well-being.”
It wasn’t sustainable obviously. Eating is supposed to be nourishment and pleasure! It’s not about restrictions, guilt trips or anxiety.
I’m grateful that I was able to move away from it before it got worse. But most importantly, I'm glad I was able to catch myself and realize that what I was chasing wasn't aligned to who I am
So why am I sharing this with you?
Sometimes when we try to build better habits or reach certain goals we often take ourselves OUT of the equation
Instead we see this “perfect ideal” and we attach our worth with that persona. That wholeness will come once we do X thing
What happens when you slip? Maybe break a resolution, missed a deadline, not do the 'thing' you wanted to do?
You might sink into guilt, disappointment and sometimes even self loathing
But here’s the thing, there's no such thing as perfection. You walking towards change, stepping towards your goals is already a huge shift to get into alignment. But don't be so focused on the metrics that you forget about you and your why.
5 Questions to Get you Back into Alignment
1. How ARE you?
This might seem like a simple trivial question. One that we get asked everyday! But do we actually go deep enough to notice?
Most of us are rushing from the moment we wake up until we finish work. It’s one task after another. And sometimes it’s impossible to get a minute to ourselves no matter how much we try.
So how can we check in with ourselves? Either first thing in the morning or late at night are the best times. Whatever you choose, make sure you've created space
- Morning pages: First thing you do, before you reach your phone or invite any noise in, listen to yourself. Just write down whatever your mind wants. Start with 5 min, 10 min a day. The more you do it, the easier thoughts will flow
- Journalling (day or/and night) is therapeutic for your mind. And you don’t have to necessarily write anything interesting, but just let your thoughts pour out. Things you want to accomplish, how are you feeling, what would you love to do. Just get your mind flowing with no editing.
2. Who are you?
“The thing about meditation is: You. You become more and more you.” — David Lynch
Meditation! Yes, this is everywhere! But there’s a reason meditation is causing such a buzz. We are surrounded by distractions, now more than ever. Meditation allows us to quiet down the external stimulations and establish a direct connection to ourselves. It brings us back to our essence. I wrote about the different kinds of meditation here
3. Who do you want to be?
“A strength is what you do, that makes you feel strengthened” - Marcus Buckingham
We all have dreams and goals. We aspire to create. We have gifts to share but are told early on that we’re not good enough if we’re not the best. To stop dreaming and follow the path that’s been laid out for us.
Well, let me tell you…fulfillment comes from doing what makes you light up. From using our skills, making our dreams come true. That’s us finding and fulfilling our purpose. So even if you don’t know what you want, start with any kind of dream or goal and look into the why behind it. A bit more about playing your strengths here
4. What brings you joy?
“We are spiritual beings having a human experience” - Pierre Teilhard de Chardin
What are the little things that stir your heart? Like taking a stroll by the lake? Eating at your favourite restaurant? Curling up to a good book? Taking a nice bath? Sometimes we forget about these little pleasures. It’s crucial we find ways to embrace what makes us happy, that is after all what life is!
5. How do you want to feel?
“Knowing how you actually want to feel is the most potent form of clarity that you can have.” ― Danielle LaPorte
Our feelings tell us so much about ourselves. You can start off with “ I want to feel _________ “ and then list out the things that make you feel this way. Is that a feeling you want everyday? Is it nourishing you? Here are some of my core desired feelings: Grounded, because I’m running two businesses and sometimes they get quite busy! Journalling or doing yoga helps me feel grounded.
Another feeling is ‘unleashed’ I want to live my purpose and unleash my skills and strengths to the world. What makes me feel unleashed is working on my passions (design and wellness). If you want more information on how to get into your core desired feelings, Danielle Laporte’s Desire Map is THE book if it